Thursday, January 16, 2014
Friday, January 10, 2014
Friday, January 3, 2014
Hurt
I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything
What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
I wear this crown of shit
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I will keep myself
I would find a way
Monday, December 23, 2013
All I want for Christmas is...
My Dad.
He would read us The Polar Express on Christmas Eve.
No matter how tough things were he always made sure that it was special for us. He always held it together during tough financial times and was the best Santa.
I wish I could be that great of a parent.
I can only hope my kids feel the same way about me as I do about my father.
Maybe someday I will be able to have a perfect holiday season. A perfect holiday season when I can feel the magic during this time of year like I once did as a child.
Not as I do now crippled with depression, sadness and anxiety.
All I want for Christmas is you (dad)
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
In for the kill
But when we start making fires
We get ever so hot
Whether we like it or not
They say we can love who we trust
But what is love without lust?
Two hearts with accurate devotions
And what are feelings without emotions?
I'm going in for the kill
I'm doing it for a thrill
Oh I'm hoping you'll understand
And not let go of my hand
I hang my hopes out on the line
Will they be ready for you in time
If you leave them out too long
They'll be withered by the sun
Full stops and exclamation marks
My words stumble before I start
How far can you send emotions?
Can this bridge cross the ocean?
I'm going in for the kill
I'm doing it for a thrill
Oh I'm hoping you'll understand
And not let go of my hand
Let's go to war
To make peace
Let's be cold
To create heat
I hope in darkness
We can see
And you're not blinded by the light from me
I'm going in for the kill
I'm doing it for a thrill
Oh I'm hoping you'll understand
And not let go of my hand
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Friday, November 29, 2013
Fuck Christmas. Fuck Black Friday
This time of year can fuck off. I hate it even more this year. I don't have parents. I just have to play Santa for the little ones. I can't ruin their hopes and dreams like mine have been.
Friday, November 22, 2013
Better late then never... Band Aid on a Bulletwound's 3 year Anniversary !!!
3 years ago I started this blog in hopes that it would be so I could get my artwork out there. It has mostly become a mental dump of what is rolling around in my brain: song lyrics that I feel are pertaining to my life, music videos, shameless "selfies"/ photo documentation of random life events, cool imagery found on the Internet and barely my artwork.
I had high hopes... But I am not disappointed in the evolution.
The last 3 years of my life have been the most depressing 3 years I have had since I was a teenager.
Please don't go, I can't handle anymore abandonment. My life can't get much worse so here's to hoping that things will start getting better...
PS, I love you forever Dad. I miss you so much and it's only been 13 days...
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